Friday, April 20, 2012

~ this morning ~

Suddenly wide awake.
(a noise? a dream?)
The thoughts start up; the list of chores for the day, the not-to-forget things, the conversations I'd have if only I was brave enough, the wish-lists, the plans, the projects, the things to remember to tell the Doc when he comes home.  
Then they're racing.  Round and round and round...
Demanding attention. Spinning around. Making me anxious.  Extinguishing all hope of more sleep.

And then...
Little footsteps.
A drowsy body snuggled into mine.
Warm breath on my shoulder.

My thoughts slow.
My body stills.
And my heart feels the peace of knowing love, knowing that all is ok.

Do you get anxious?  How do you deal with it?


  1. this is nicole, from flickr ;)

    i do get anxious, very much so. so much so that i take meds for it which i was resistant to for so long.

    lately, i have been meditating and exercizing more, which is helping a lot, and i hope to ditch the meds soon enough.

    a lot of times, in the moment, i will think of one of my patients and realize, "be here now. this is all you need." that helps, too ;)

  2. Your writing is beautiful. I do get anxious. I have spent much of my life paralysed by it. Now days I meditate and that helps. For a while I did yoga and that really helped. The best thing I did was learn to distance myself from my thoughts. Thoughts are just thoughts. They are not real. You can choose to take them or let them pass on into the ether. I also try to speak kindly to myself, to encourage me to trust myself - that I do know what to do, that I can cope, that all is ok. Easier said than done, but all that has totally helped. I still get anxious but now I am much more aware of what it is and what it is doing to me. Touch, hugs, etc are the best therapy, especially from the smalls.
    I love your post. It's beautiful and insightful.

  3. Beautiful, touching post. I get less anxious since dealing with Mom's illness. Somehow, dealing with something so serious puts everything else in perspective.

    Lesley x.

  4. anxious and anxiety that's me...lately. i did go to the naturopath and she's made me up some remedies which are helping. x

  5. Gorgeous post, Ally. Yes this is me and, like you, I draw on the ones I love to calm me.

  6. Love your post and picture.Going for a run or a walk is my number one remedy to clear my anxious mind...just sometimes my legs do not agree :) Happy and lovely weekend Ally x

  7. Oh yes Ally. I try not to be but not very successfully! Generally a hug from Rob or watching the dogs and I'm over it. But I think your solution sounds perfect!

  8. Then little footsteps ... Ours wriggle and scrape and kick and generally take ages to fall back asleep only to suddenly wake and need that wee you've been encouraging them about. More often the little one wakes to one parent as one or the other has sought the sanctuary of a recently vacated bed elsewhere ;-)

    Have I rambled? Yes, a little. Have I answered your question? No :-)

  9. Oh Ally, such a beautiful post! I love this, and I feel it too. Anxious doesn't frequent me too often, but when it does I try to make time to sit still for a few minutes and tune-in to the true rhythm of me - there I find calm. Elisa xx

  10. Ally, I have been thinking about this post since I read it weeks ago. I think recognising that you are anxious is a huge start to feeling better. I am sure I have been anxious all my life, it was not until I learnt what it was, that I could really learn to deal with it. Yoga has always made a huge difference. Thinking lots of positive, happy thought helps me too. Being grateful for all I have also helps me. Just taking big, long deep breaths also helps if I am in a stressful situation. Big hug. Cat xox


I'd love to hear from you - in fact it will probably make my day